Romeo must die

“what would you do, to get to me, what would you say, to have your way” everyone are reaching out to someone, whomever their heart choose. The reasons being? The questions of random hearts are a real motherfucker, too precise, yet contradictive, ones can never tells accurately. How I wish sometimes things are straightforward and vibrant in color like it was in ‘wonderland’, well the journey might have been narrow and twisted, at least in the end it was worth it, confronting the ‘Queen of Heart’. Well, you should get the idea by now that I’m obsessed with “Wonderland”, but that is another story..

My heart hardly spoken to me these days, I figured, why should I wait for the right signal, when everything is ever so clear right in front of me. And the reason I have been hesitating so much is, #@#$%**@$$#%&** shit I can’t put it into words. What the hell??? This is madness; I wish the mad hatter could lend me his point of view. I have qualify myself as an irresponsible bloggers by intentionally forged an attempt of abandoning my blog, and this post supposed to be justifying the long silence? Ok, let me just finish off this chaotic in-sight and regain the appropriate momentum for blogging. I wonder how long would that be? Well, the fact for that matter is, I have been in a transition of adjusting myself to London lifestyles, I touched down Heathrow on September 24 2007, and its been like what, 3 month since, I’m still in this ‘trance’ state. I shall update on how is has been like from KL to London scene. Like I said, when I paced myself back to descending momentum. Till then, play safe bitches and SOBes, ooh, by that I mean, condom and contraceptive pills! XOXO

p/s: I have a point when I was writing the first paragraph, but I kinda lost myself halfway in the second paragraph. I promise I shall justify my point to “Romeo must die” when the ideas popped in my head again. So, at the moment lets just stick to the title purely because I feel that its catchy!

*Revolting Tales*

Once upon a time, there was a boy, born innocent and bright. As an adolescent, he dreamed of life would come out in a perspectives manner, resulting hapiness, or the way he sees it, a wonderland. As years passed, and reality place in motion, he realized that 'wonderland' has the most twisted outcomes in store. It was fun to see through an innocent child eyes, but as mistakes keep taking charge, then adulthood means to constantly doing sins, he began to have a reservations, maybe its a bad idea after all to follow the white rabbit? Hanging on to that thoughts, the rabbit just keep on moving forward, while the boy was left behind, plummeted in the chaos of the reality of wonderland. He has been in that state for timeless it seems to him, observing all kind of characters, in returns, demand his sanity, then he started to lose control. And the dreams fortress he begin to build since a child, begin to rumble, slowly, but painfully. Then one day, just as ordinary as others, he found a desire, well not that he haven't found it in another person before, but that day, he feels as the 'light' that he thought had lost forever, seems to be restored. Although, throughout the negativity that often reclaiming its showtimes, he locks his heart, and denied love, that seems to be necessary to most around him. He is thankful that God has allowed his desire to erupt, that day, that it left him the true feeling of freedom, which is having the most important thing in the world without owning it. Considering the way that 'wonderland' has been so far, one happy day is almost a miracle! Then is was taken away from him. So, the question is, how does a boy, thrown into a rabbit hole, bombarded with all the chaos and encountered with those demanding characters, come out fine? And the answer is, he doesn't. He becomes evil, intimidating, envious and dangerous, the rest are history!
XOXO
-dedicated to future doctors! mends those unwell heart

Stripped pt.2

sorry if i ain't perfect, sorry i don't give a fuck*
sorry i ain't not even dandy, sorry just know what i want
sorry i'm not a virgin, sorry i'm not a slut
to all fellow dreamers out there, i'm with you
all my underdogs, i feel you
lift your head high and stay strong, keep pushing on...


Yes, so, I seems to be neglecting this online blog for a while now, but i'm not actually sorry for being busy in the reality world. I’m sort of embracing my final weeks in KL, before leaving this city, again..

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Cupid 112

Girl if I told you I love you
That doesn't mean that I don't care, oooh
And when I tell you I need you
Don't you think that I'll never be there, ooooh

[1] - Baby I'm so tired of the way you turn my words into
Deception and lies
Don't misunderstand me when I try to speak my mind
I'm only saying what's in my heart

[2] - Cupid doesn't lie
But you won't know unless you give it a try
Oh baby, true love
won't lie but we won't know unless we give it a try
give it a try

Girl when I ask you to trust me
That doesn't mean that I'm gonna cheat on you
Cuz I'm gonna never do anything to hurt you
Or mislead you, I love you


Ain't no doubt about it
Lord no, I really mean it
I rather die before, before I lie to you
Never wanna leave ya
Ain't no life without you
Never gonna leave, never gonna go, no
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, ohhhh

Ruthless people...

Is it true that we, the vain society are the ruthless bunch in the society? We are primarily derived to the attention that we get, both positive and negative, as long as we hit the spotlight. The fact is, it is not easy to be on the spotlights, especially if we are looking at being known through our noble act or outstanding achievement, lets face it, not everyone is fortunate in that sense. So, the fast lane ticket, to achieve our obsession is simply by being ruthless, does that make any sense?

How shall I put it, urmm, raise up your hands if you ever intentionally do something merciless or plain cruel to others and end up feeling superior with yourself? I myself to certain extent felt a jolt of excitement and satisfaction that in return neglecting the adverse on the innocent being, what more, I think they deserve it anyway, isn’t that demonstarate the act of ruthless? For starters, it does fall under the descriptions.

I feel that the primary act of cruelty amongst us, methaphore of a big circle, of nature ways to get everyone a fair deal, I fucked you, you fucked him, he fucked her, and she fucked me, and it goes around and around, so the words what goes around comes around easily fit in here. The thing with this kind of deal, it does attract the awareness of the populace and they came driven to it as well, isn’t that what we want?

Although, do you agree, if I say that our ruthless behavior are associated with our own insecurities and frustration, that we were once hurt, and we want others to feel our pain coz sharing pain are not gratifying at all, so we need others to feel and getting hurt like we did, and that give the impression of equality. The more we are screwed, the further we want to get even. Is it relevant for me to say that we the vain society still people of the world, do our thing, get hurts, only our way of getting even could be controversial?

This totally came out of nowhere, but do you know those days of roman empire, where gladiators are the source of entertainment, the crowd at colesseo, goes completely crazy over the brutality and violence amongst those men, and do you know there was only 2 percent chance of survival out of that sadistic entertainment. I guess, the history kind of revive its content, maybe with a different face.

So, bitches and SOBes, who do you fucked recently? XOXO

i'm horny!

We only see what our eyes want to see. So here it goes….

The night is young, even so, its already passed 12am, but the unfulfilled desire appear to erupt this time around. Why is it longing seems to just? Everyday, when we look in the mirror, I know, we the vain society does whenever has the chance, stare at our own reflection before leaving the house, some glance at the compact powder mirror ritually a day to see if anything needs perfection, but what really did we see? Is it a mirror of ourselves or someone else? Why do we care so much on the surface when ultimately no one knows how we feel inside? You might be thinking, ‘I crave for a krispy kream donuts’ or ‘I want to stay in bed instead of be here with all this retards’ or ‘why did he left me so abruptly, am I undeserving?’ or ‘last night sex was mind blowing, I want more!’ or ‘ I don’t want to live anymore, there is no love for me’, does anyone know?

So, bitches and SOB, are you on heat tonight? Coz if you do, tell me what is in your mind to get rid of that revolting desire if you’re lying there all by yourself, I am definite to a certain point in live, masturbation doesn’t do the trick anymore. Oh, anyhoo, guys and girls do masturbate, only girls in my demographic society make it as a well kept secret confessed only with God, however bitches of the vain society, aren’t you proud to tell who or in this context what has been in your vagina? Of course you should be, I once went to adult shop with a mate of mine, and she was so peculiar looking for the right dildo, and end up with the ‘purple rabbit’ haha if you know what that is, saying it is for the rainy days. A couple months later I was at her place for a quick stop, and I found that apparently the ‘purple rabbit’ had a few friends, there’s ‘mr blackie’, long and thick, another ‘rabbit’ and another, thai beads, all lying around. So I asked her, “so its been raining here often lately eh missy?” Of course it end up me and her cracking hysterically and me mockingly shove one ‘rabbit’ to my ass, ouch! Haha

So, yea, is it raining at your place now? Xxxxxxxxxxxx
p/s: my mate is really an outstanding person both academically and personality, she just had quite an appetite, but all of you don’t get to see that, haha fuck me!

silent lightning

it is the wee hour, and it starting to storm in silent, and raindrops finally pouring, catch me now, im falling... geez, what a poetic crap, but honestly it is pouring now, and the lighning makes it stage present a few times. Urmm, do you bitches and SOB believe in safety net? You know that kind of security measure that whenever relationships doesn't seems to work out, there will always that one person, like a safety net, you can always run to, and feel belong again, I don't know, in my vain mind at this hour that thoughts intertwine.

Do you have a safety net? Someone to catch you when you fall? Is it your bestfriend, the one that understands you, the emotions and retarded parts, can a boy and a girl be more than just friends, well in these days, for that matter even boy and boy or girl and girl, which ever suits the preference, can it be more than that? Answering a question with a question, doesn't seems to solve anything now does it.

The thing with having a safety net is, you oughta to start to trust in a person and the thing with moi', i don't trust anyone. which left me with no safety net, the reason being in my 'vain' head, everyone wants a piece of everyone. You want to hug me.. You want to kiss me.. You want to touch me, there.. You want my money.. You want to sex me.. You want my body.. And the worst and scariest of all, you think you owned me.. So, would you rather have a piece of me now? hahaha I don't know what is so funny, but it does sound pretty hillarious to me, well you can have it anyway, i'll stay fickle in the end and its all about moi'! Signing out now, goodnight crazy beautiful xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Valley of the dolls...

It’s been lucky number seven, years since we reached millennium, well eight then if you count the problematic zero effect. So, bitches and SOB, what is like ever since? Despite reaching level 3 in globalization in this near year aka competitions amongst individual worldwide, socially, we’re preaching the same thing over and over the decade. I’ve been residing in KL aka Kuala Lumpur aka Kuala Lumpar, as the foreigners often said aka my birth place, after years been away, and am I left in raptures with what this metropolitan has yet to offer; hang on it doesn’t reach metropolitan status for haven sake, this city has evolve into? And the answer is not entirely in satisfaction aspects.

Looking back into my adolescent years aka my childhood, every images are portrayed in the most prominent moral. Thee elders are always right and made the virtuous decisions, no question about it. People should be nice and pleasant to one another, always try to make room to spread good essences in everyday life. We ride bike in the evening, trying to behold the adventure it seems, the serenade joy and innocent pleasure. Sometimes we play soccer, hide and seek, rounders aka kind of baseball, police and thief etc etc with the neighborhood kids, everyone seems fair and the only thing outstanding was how well we played. The evening seem the most anticipated awaited moment. We went to school, looking forward for weekends, watched telly although there is not much choice then as there were only 3 channels then to roamed, but we never complained. I clearly remember the time when it was Piala Malaysia everyone was all psyche; we could even hear the neighbors screams of excitement. We haven’t the luxury of cable TV or here in Malaysia we call em’ ASTRO, no chains of malls exciting enough to hang about, no internet and it was never a great deal to things and luxuries that we don’t even know. What we had was simple, moderate and most of all not even close to great, but we were sublimely happy with the simplicity of life back then.

Teenagers years, the reality of life place in motion revealing it true meaning, and in certain scenario leaving unhealed scar, unstable emotions, mixed feelings, ascending of anger and hatred, sexual awakening, social pressure to fit in, brand conscious, popularity toll, peer pressure, first sex then so on, friendship bonding, making enemies, starting point for long hours talking on the phone, backstabbing, fist fighting, cigarette, alcohol, drugs, music obsession, rebel without a cause, don’t we generation Y went through generally the same thing? They say it’s the hormonal changes, I say it’s the fucked up cosmos we walked into. No one gives a damn on these screwed up mumbo jumbo coz in this vain society all that matters are the surface, everything are fine and peach, no room for broken souls, so keep your chin up!

the vain society

Greetings bitches and SOB! in this corrupt sand of vulnerability, i shall keep it simple and emphasise on the keywords, i shall share stories based on fiction/ fact or its combinations, evolve around Envy, sex, Sloth, friendship, Gluttony, deception, Wrath, cult, Pride, anger, Lust, current affairs, Greed, betrayal, lies etc etc.........
so, the rest of you are more than welcome to read my stories and be as judgemental as you wish coz that is what we are, the judge of others, but often in denial to admit. you can be sexist or even racist coz for the vain society, you are welcome to be. so be it!